Men & Women

I do not usually open forwarded mails especially from those I am far from familiar with, just popping virtually out of nowhere. But ever since the ADZU Highschool Batch 89 Yahoogroup was formed sometime last year, forwarded emails become more and more familiar and I’ve got to open them up or be a killjoy in the net. (Don’t you feel sometimes obligated to open semi-spams just because they’re from someone you know?) At times I felt that way but you know generally I feel gratified just to be mailed at, often straight from America, especially when the emails get funnier and funnier by the day.

Here’s one funny forwarded email from Egay Bayabos—-a highschool batchmate who’s now in Florida…errr….Virginia….No, Texas I think….Oh what the heck, it’s not important where he is right now coz I get confused often. There’s just so many of ‘em Batch 89 members who are in America right now….migrated or migrating.

Here’s how the email goes:

ABOUT MEN:

• 1. Men are like …….. Laxatives …… They irritate the shit out of you.






• 2. Men are like …….. Bananas …… The older they get, the less firm they are.






• 3. Men are like …….. Weather ….. Nothing can be done to change them..






• 4. Men are like …….. Blenders ….. You need One, but you’re not quite sure why.






• 5. Men are like ……. Chocolate Bars …. Sweet, smooth, & they usually head right for your hips.






• 6. Men are like ……. Commercials …… You can’t believe a word they say.






• 7. Men are like …….. Department Stores ….. Their clothes are always 1/2 off.






• 8. Men are like …….. Government Bonds ….. They take soooooooo long to mature.




• 9. Men are like ……. Mascara …… They usually run at the first sign of emotion.






• 10. Men are like ……. Popcorn . ….. They satisfy you, but only for a little while.




• 
  11. Men are like ……. Snowstorms …………. You never know when they’re coming,
  
  

  how many inches you’ll get or how long it will last.





• 12. Men are like …….. Lava Lamps ….. Fun to look at, but not very bright.






• 13. Men are like …….. Parking Spots . All the good ones are taken, the rest are handicapped.

ABOUT WOMEN:

1. BEHIND EVERY
   SUCCESSFUL WOMAN
   IS HERSELF.








2. A WOMAN IS LIKE A TEA BAG…
   YOU DON’T KNOW HOW STRONG
   SHE IS UNTIL YOU PUT HER
   IN HOT WATER.












3. I HAVE YET TO HEAR A MAN
   ASK FOR ADVICE ON HOW
   TO COMBINE MARRIAGE
   AND A CAREER .








4. 
   

   
   

   COFFEE, C HOCOLATE, MEN.
   SOME THINGS ARE JUST
   BETTER RICH.













5. I’M OUT OF ESTROGEN
   And I HAVE A GUN.